Style Invitational Week 1120: Celebrating our Differences: a retro comparison contest Plus ‘USSRia’ and other winning neologisms from place names Holey, holey, holey: socks and ’Skins. (Bob Staake for The Washington Post ) By Pat Myers April 16 (Click here to skip down <#report> to the winning and Losing neologisms from Week 1116) /The Redskins’ offensive line vs. a pile of odd socks:/ The socks have almost as many holes. /A tattoo of Joe Biden vs. a Style Invitational Loser Magnet:/ If you had the magnet attached to your shoulder, /maybe/ Biden wouldn’t want to play with it. *• A $4 haircut • Dilbert’s necktie • Ruth Bader Ginsburg doing the Macarena • that “not so fresh” feeling • pizza-scented shampoo • the Redskins’ offensive line • a pile of odd socks • the 400-meter dash • a Style Invitational Loser magnet • “American Gothic” • Mohandas K. Gandhi • an elderly Labrador retriever • an Elizabethan sonnet • a tattoo of Joe Biden • Yemen • an overactive bladder • a three-cupped bra* One of these men will go home with you if you win second prize. And it’s not Dean Evangelista of Rockville, Md. ( Selfie by Dean Evangelista) One of the most enduring (a.k.a. really easy to create) Style Invitational contests has been the one in which the Czar or Empress offers a list of random nouns and asks readers to explain how any two of the items are alike or different. Over the years, some of the winning comparisons seemed so fitting that we’ve been accused of constructing the list with those results in mind. But nobody could accuse the Empress of being/this/ well organized: *This week: Each of the above 17 items appeared in a different Style Invitational compare/contrast contest from 1996 to 2014. Explain how any two of them are alike or different or otherwise linked, *as in the examples above. Winner gets the Inkin’ Memorial , the Lincoln statue bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives an eerily realistic life-size cardboard cutout photo of President Obama, donated by 12-time Loser Dean Evangelista. The cutout folds up, so we can mail it, but the winner will still have to wait till after May 30, because the Loser Community is absolutely going to use this as a prop during the Flushies, the Losers’ annual awards lunch.(See this week’s Style Conversational for details.) Other runners-up win their choice of a yearned-for Loser Mug or the ardently desired “Whole Fools” Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get a lusted-after Loser magnet designed by Bob Staake: either “The Wit Hit the Fan” or “Hardly Har-Har.” First Offenders receive a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). E-mail entries to /losers@washpost.com / or, if you were born in the 19th century, fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday night, April 27; results published May 17 (online May 14). You may submit up to 25 entries per contest. Include “Week 1120” in your e-mail subject line or it might be ignored as spam. Include your real name, postal address and phone number with your entry. See contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/InvRules . The headline for this week’s results is by Tom Witte; the honorable-mentions subhead is by Chris Doyle. Join the lively Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at /on.fb.me/invdev ./ “Like” the Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at /bit.ly/inkofday. / *The Style Conversational: * The Empress’s weekly online column, posted late Thursday, discusses each new contest and set of results. Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at wapo.st/styleconv . And the results of the Style Invitational contest posted four weeks ago . . . INKING GLOBALLY: THE PLACE-NEOLOGISMS OF WEEK 1116: In Week 1116, we asked you to come up with a new term using the letters of a place name and define it; you didn’t have to use all the letters but you couldn’t reuse them. 4th place: From “Florida”: *La Froid:* A state where global warming can’t happen . (Don Druker, Rockville, Md., who got his only previous Invite ink in Week 94, back in 1995) 3rd place: From “Dallas”:*Sallad:* In North Texas, the sprig of parsley on top of your T-bone. (Mark Raffman, Reston, Va.) 2nd place and the Creepy Horse Man dashboard thingie: From “Montana”: *Not-a-man:* Someone who neither hunts nor fishes. (Mark Raffman) And the winner of the Inkin’ Memorial: From “Russia”: *USSRia:* Putin’s grand vision. (Peter Jenkins, Bethesda, Md.) Down under: honorable mentions From “Boca Raton”: *Baconrot:* A skin condition combining advanced age and severe tan. “My grandmother lies by her condo pool all day, working on her baconrot.” (Bird Waring, Larchmont, N.Y.) From “Benghazi”: *Ba-zing!:* Audience cry heard at tea party rallies every time there’s an attack on you-know-who. (Robert Schechter, Dix Hills, N.Y.) From “San Francisco”: *Cancan of Sirs:* Annual line dance on Castro Street. (Christopher Damm, Charles Town, W.Va.) From “Buffalo”: *Off-blu:* Common Northern skin tone. (Gregory Huyck, Frederick, Md., a First Offender) From “Des Moines”: *Demnoises:* Thunderings that Iowans hear every four years from outsiders proclaiming themselves huge fans of ethanol and all other things corn. May be drowned out this year by gopnoises. (Jim Stiles, Rockville, Md.) From“Montgomery County” : *Countermom:* Someone who knows what’s best for someone else’s children. (Ward Kay, Vienna, Va.) From “Saskatchewan”: *Eh-tack: *An inoffensive offensive. (Kevin Dopart, Washington) From “Boston”: “Turn off the storm, *Snobot.*” “I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.” (Julia Shawhan, Silver Spring, Md.) From “Charlottesville”: *Chattelover:* What gossips called the original owner of Monticello. (Amy Harris, Charlottesville, Va., a First Offender) From “Leicester”: *Restlice:* Agitated, itchy and crawling with bugs. Hey, you would be too, if you’d been buried under a parking lot for 530 years . (Roy Ashley, Washington) From “Potomac”: *TooPAC:* Collect checks from yo’ friends and wife. Cross the bridge, living the Smug Life!” (Todd DeLap, Fairfax, Va.) From “Indianapolis”: *Spinload:* Calling discrimination “religious freedom.” (George-Ann Rosenberg, Washington) From “Saint Petersburg”: *Putin Tears:* Regret over countries not invaded and enemies still alive. (Gary Crockett, Chevy Chase, Md.) From “Silver Spring”:*Essing:* Adding an “s”where it doesn’t belong . (Ted Weitzman, Olney, Md.) From “Los Angeles”: *All-Egoness:* Every city needs a motto. (Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.) From “Beverly Hills”: *Bellyshrivel:* What most of the town’s doctors do. (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.) From “Key West”: *Styweek:* Spring break. (Mary Kappus, Washington) From “Austin”:*Anti-Us:* How the rest of Texas regards residents of the state capital, and vice versa. (Frank Osen) From “Silicon Valley”: *Evillainy:* What’s causing hackers to date your data. (Frank Osen) From “Silicon Valley”: *“No Evil”? Silly:* Google’s revised motto after it decided that privacy and profit don’t mix. (Gary Crockett) From “North Carolina”: *TarHail: *Welcome, y’all! (Dave Komornik, Danville, Va.) From “Charleston”: *HaSnort:* Snooty reaction of a South Carolinian touring the West Virginia capital. (Dave Komornik) From “Abu Dhabi”: *Dubbiah: *Well-known provider of air bases. (Jack McBroom, Fort Valley, Va.) From “Georgetown”: *GoreWon:* Old bumper sticker still seen on Volvos in D.C. neighborhoods. (George-Ann Rosenberg) From “Phoenix”: *Nixhope:* Welcome center for undocumented immigrants. (Ellen Raphaeli, Falls Church, Va.) From “Cartagena, Colombia”:*Cab, gal, erotomania:* Only one of these is an authorized Secret Service travel expense. (Chris Doyle, Ponder, Tex.) From “Washington”: *WagNosh:* A Style Invitational Loser brunch. (John O’Byrne, Dublin, who has come over from Ireland to at least two of them) From “Mississippi”: *MissPissi:* Deep South term for a cranky store clerk. (Dan Steinbrocker, Los Angeles) From “Ponder, Texas”: *Dope sex rant:* Why my neighbors avoid me. (Chris Doyle, Ponder, Tex.) // *Still running — deadline Monday night, April 20: Our contest to name and describe new colors. See bit.ly/invite1119. *